Let me pour myself a little Edgar Martinez with some anchovy Tony Olivas and let's have a Frank Thomas discussion about the DH.
Some of you hate it, have always hated it, are never gonna like it and you want it gone. Your aunt with the mole like a corncob pipe that insists on kissing you can have that removed. The DH is not going anywhere, so this whole discussion takes place in the real world...
Eye black, and she was a
"free swinger". That makes
her a DH in my book
...a world where there's no way in hell the MLB Player's Association is gonna allow baseball to cut short the careers of guys who are making 8 figures a year and aren't even allowed to order an Ove Glove from late night infomercials.
And now, according to published reports, the DH is coming to the National League.
If you're into symmetry in general, this is a good thing. Both leagues, same rules, you don't have to juggle your fantasy lineup because that coveted subway series between the Mariners and the Marlins is taking place all weekend.
But what are we gonna lose when the DH hits the senior circuit ?
Strategy, mostly. The artistry of guys like Bruce Bochy, who make lineup cards look like Timothy Leary invented Sudoku.
Managers who don't care about the social media impact of bringing in Perez to pitch to Helton. (Perez Helton! Get it ? Don't get it ? It's funny to your son who is gonna transition to be your daughter in two years, trust me).
Losing that strategy will take away some of the charm of the game, not to mention the extra couple beers you can quaff at Wrigley while the guy who is gonna throw one pitch to a left-hander is taking 45 warmup pitches.
But it doesn't have to be this way: Here is Jimmy Doom's Official Suggestion as to how to have the DH in the NL and not sink strategy by running into a North Atlantic Blomberg.
His bat is in the HOF.
His mustache is not.
In both leagues (and that's the Kruks of this whole debate, right ?) the starting pitcher bats until such time as the manager removes him for a reliever. The DH then takes the plate appearances for all subsequent relievers, though the DH could be pinch hit for by someone then deemed ineligible to play in the field during that contest.
My idea could change the entire dynamic of the bullpen; make the long reliever not just the guy you go to when your 4th starter is getting shelled like a bag of pistachios on Willie Nelson's tour bus, but a guy you bring in in a scoreless tie because your ace is pitching against Kershaw, who Pharell Williams couldn't get a hit off of, it's late in the regular season, he's leading off the following inning and you might wanna Bumgarner him 3 days from now, so if you keep his pitch count low you have that option. That scenario also makes guys who hit for average a viable option at DH and would still keep the double switch alive.
Whatta ya say, Kenesaw Mountain Manfred ? I think it would work. So do three of my friends and four of my dearest acquaintances.
C'mon, Commish! Don't tell me to go to Hal... Give my idea a McRae of sunshine...
Some of you hate it, have always hated it, are never gonna like it and you want it gone. Your aunt with the mole like a corncob pipe that insists on kissing you can have that removed. The DH is not going anywhere, so this whole discussion takes place in the real world...
"free swinger". That makes
her a DH in my book
...a world where there's no way in hell the MLB Player's Association is gonna allow baseball to cut short the careers of guys who are making 8 figures a year and aren't even allowed to order an Ove Glove from late night infomercials.
And now, according to published reports, the DH is coming to the National League.
If you're into symmetry in general, this is a good thing. Both leagues, same rules, you don't have to juggle your fantasy lineup because that coveted subway series between the Mariners and the Marlins is taking place all weekend.
But what are we gonna lose when the DH hits the senior circuit ?
Strategy, mostly. The artistry of guys like Bruce Bochy, who make lineup cards look like Timothy Leary invented Sudoku.
Managers who don't care about the social media impact of bringing in Perez to pitch to Helton. (Perez Helton! Get it ? Don't get it ? It's funny to your son who is gonna transition to be your daughter in two years, trust me).
Losing that strategy will take away some of the charm of the game, not to mention the extra couple beers you can quaff at Wrigley while the guy who is gonna throw one pitch to a left-hander is taking 45 warmup pitches.
But it doesn't have to be this way: Here is Jimmy Doom's Official Suggestion as to how to have the DH in the NL and not sink strategy by running into a North Atlantic Blomberg.
His mustache is not.
In both leagues (and that's the Kruks of this whole debate, right ?) the starting pitcher bats until such time as the manager removes him for a reliever. The DH then takes the plate appearances for all subsequent relievers, though the DH could be pinch hit for by someone then deemed ineligible to play in the field during that contest.
My idea could change the entire dynamic of the bullpen; make the long reliever not just the guy you go to when your 4th starter is getting shelled like a bag of pistachios on Willie Nelson's tour bus, but a guy you bring in in a scoreless tie because your ace is pitching against Kershaw, who Pharell Williams couldn't get a hit off of, it's late in the regular season, he's leading off the following inning and you might wanna Bumgarner him 3 days from now, so if you keep his pitch count low you have that option. That scenario also makes guys who hit for average a viable option at DH and would still keep the double switch alive.
Whatta ya say, Kenesaw Mountain Manfred ? I think it would work. So do three of my friends and four of my dearest acquaintances.
C'mon, Commish! Don't tell me to go to Hal... Give my idea a McRae of sunshine...
Great idea and great Hilton line...I was wondering a couple of weeks ago what happened to the Charade. Much like the weather, guess it was in deep freeze. This past week your batting above the Mendoza line, but disappointed Rusty Kuntz didn't make your lineup.
ReplyDeleteThanks Todd. It's Wonderful Monds to hear from you.
ReplyDelete